Ron Artest? Michael Vick? Meh. They've got nothing on baseball's lowliest cretins.

5. Pete Rose
An obvious choice, owing to his years of swearing he didn't gamble on baseball… then admitting his misdeeds... then capitalizing on the controversy by selling a book and signing "I'm sorry I bet on baseball" tchotchkes. He drew a 30-day suspension for shoving an ump, spent five months in the pen for tax evasion, ignored his son for years, you name it. No, Rose didn't deserve to be portrayed by Tom Sizemore in the ESPN biopic about his troubles—that's a fate nobody deserves—but in retrospect, only the "hustler" part of his Charlie Hustle persona was truly didactic. On the plus side, he cut a mean Aqua Velva promo.