Red Wings’ Prospect Gets “Super Drunk”

The Teletubbies may have made an appearance. Oh, and also the police.

(Photos: Dave Reginek/NHLI via Getty Images / BBC)


Usually, we prefer our professional athletes to play at least one game before going batshit crazy, but with the NHL lockout cutting deep into the season, we admire Riley Sheahan for taking some initiative and losing his damn mind right away.


The Red Wings’ prospect was arrested on October 29th (why didn’t anyone tell us sooner?!) for driving on the wrong side of the road. The 20-year-old handed the police officer the license of his teammate, Brendan Smith (dick move, bro) and proceeded to blow a .30 blood alcohol level, which they completely seriously refer to in Michigan as being “super drunk.”


Oh, also, did we mention that, at the time of the incident, he was wearing a purple Teletubbies costume? Because he definitely was. That’s “Tinky Winky,” for those of you not familiar with late ’90s children’s television.


So, we salute you, Riley Sheahan, and eagerly await your graduation to professional insanity. We bet you could do some fine work with a bottle of mezcal and a Cookie Monster costume.

What should the rest of the pros do during the lockout?

Remember when there was pro hockey (and hotties)?