The 8 Creepiest Sex Doll Accessories
Do we even need to say this is NSFW?
Don’t you hate it when you save up all your money to buy a sex doll, only to discover you have to shell out even more dough for accessories and repairs? It’s like buying a pricey vintage car that you’re constantly restoring. Except you don’t have weird, sad sex with your car. OR DO YOU? Either way, check out some of the extra “parts” that make owning a sex doll even more creepy than usual.
Pubic Hair Patch($50)
Available in four colors and three styles (“natural,” “trimmed,” or “full”), you can transform your doll from totally pubeless to bushy firecrotch in the time it takes you to say, “I’m really, really lonely.”
Head Display Bust ($125)
The classy way to display your extra doll heads.
Replacement Tongue($15)
It’s always good to have an extra tongue on-hand if your doll is epileptic and risks biting hers off during a seizure.
Replacement Teeth ($50)
Seems counterintuitive to put bite-y parts in an orifice meant for your ween, but these chompers will help your plastic companion fit in when you take her to the Sears Portrait Studio for family photos.
Labia Repair Kit($30)
You get a new set of labia in this kit, plus adhesive, powder to color the adhesive, stirring sticks, written instructions, and a DVD that demonstrates the repair process. This will ensure you don’t accidentally glue her cooter to her elbow.
Female Flatback Torso Head Kit($100)
This is essentially a skull onto which you attach a face that you plan to degrade. It’s flat on one side, so it won’t roll around like the normal severed heads you bang.
Feet($249)
Because sometimes you just need a pair of amputated feet to get off.
Butthole($15)
Possibly the most graphic of the bunch (which is why we can’t show you a photo — click at your own risk), this asshole is ironically considered a “modesty cover,” because it hides unflattering “doll gape.”
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