It’s sad and dark to think about where the man of a century ago went when he was in need of love and sex and life advice, and fast. What did he do when he needed tips for pleasing his woman, and there was nary a men’s magazine in sight? Did he rush to his leather-bound encyclopedia set? Did he send a telegram to a friend? Where did our forefathers learn about boning and being awesome?
Luckily for us, there is the wide world of Google, a playground for the curious, a never-ending swamp of information. Here, a Maxim man has bravely typed in the words: “Girls what do you like doing during sex?” It’s kind of him to address the question to us — we love open communication! Almost as much as we love sex.
So what do girls like doing during sex? Oh, so many things! And while a woman’s desires can be hard to read — there are a few surefire ways to get us going in bed.
Just like you, women want to have fun. Sex is fun! It’s a string of really cool things we can do with our own bodies and to other people’s bodies! It’s also a little strange and confusing sometimes!
To help ease that strangeness, we’ve pulled from the Maxim archives and polled some women to answer this centuries-old question. Here’s how to help ensure that the woman you’re with will enjoy herself on top of, underneath, and next to you.
- We like a lot of it. If you’re sitting around with a woman in the middle of the day and she starts to give you sexy eyes, take the hint and make a move, dude.
- Yes, we love oral — Just as much as you do. Be generous with your mouth, good sir — but don’t be offended if she’d rather do something else instead. “I’ve had experiences where guys semi-wordlessly are like, ‘I’m gonna go down on you now,’ says Katie, 24, “which can be hot but sometimes I don’t want that.” So make your offer verbal — the answer will likely be yes.
- We love a good transition. “I like when a guy picks me up and moves me around the bed,” says Sarah, 28. The holy grail move is switching from girl on top to guy on top, without pulling out. Ladies love that.
- We don’t love overachievers. If you try to fit every single move into one single bone sesh, it’s confusing, and often downright distracting. Master a few moves women—and you—really enjoy. Try out new stuff in bits and pieces, not an all-in-one three-ring fuck circus.
- We fully support the quickie. Hell yeah.
- Make some noise. If you sound like you’re really into it, we’re more likely to get really into it, too.
- Don’t just shove your fingers in there. Yes, we want you to touch us, and yes, you can get us off with your hands. But a number of fingers roughly banging into our vaginas is not fun. “Rough sex can be hot,” says Kristen, 28. “Feeling like a rotisserie chicken on a spit, however, is not really hot.” Start gently.
- We really like having orgasms — it’s a beautiful thing that men and women have in common! And the way to get there will differ with every woman you bed. If we feel like you care about our finish, we’ll care more about, well, everything else. Which brings us to the most important thing:
- Ask! Every woman I’ve talked to about the topic says that men rarely ask her what she likes in bed. “What do you want” is a more common question, but often steers us into obligatory porny dirty talk. Every lady likes different things; talking is the easiest way to find out what those things are. And a dude who’s direct in bed and cares about what we like? That’s sexy.