We’ve seen Tinder nightmares of the “hilariously pathetic” brand before, but this one is so bad that we don’t feel right laughing about it.
Redditor Mouthymerc started a thread filed under the social site’s “Tinder” page with a desperate message, “Help! Hooked up with this chick from tinder and she hasn’t left my house in 2 days .. have another date tomorrow fml.”
Think that’s bad? It gets SO much worse. The poor guy proceeded to post a series of updates in which he claims he confronted his “date” on suspicion that she may have been homeless and asked her to leave.
When she refused, he called the police who arrested her after discovering she had several outstanding warrants and had lifted a bunch of his shit.
Another Redditor, bubonis, distilled the updates down to a play-by-play.
(8:31pm) Initial post.(8:54pm) OP considers girl might be homeless and notes that Tinder Chick’s car has out-of-state license plates.(11:54pm) OP updates, says he’s waking her up in 20 minutes and might call the police.(12:15am) OP recounts earlier conversation with Tinder Chick where she took advantage of OP’s dislike of confrontation.(12:31am) OP updates, says he’s waiting for local police to arrive. Notes that her license plates are expired.(1:41am) OP updates, says girl is now in police custody for outstanding warrants. They searched her and found OP’s stolen watch, mail, and other things, which he didn’t know were missing.(2:42am) OP posts Tinder screen shot, claims he’s going to take a shower and post a further update. No update arrived, which leads me to believe Tinder Chick escaped from police custody, killed OP, and is now wearing his skin.
Luckily, Mouthymerc did provide another update along with a picture of the girl.
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“It was a pretty crazy and at times very stressful situation that truly has me rethinking the whole approach to dating and dating ‘apps.’ As well as myself.”
Maybe we can all learn a lesson about anonymous hook-ups from this guy. For what it’s worth, he did say she gave good head.