Our culture is one of hyperbole. Not just in writing about sports, but in pretty much everything we do in the modern world, we like to oversell. We like to keep expectations high and, disappointments are the price of playing the game.
But last weekend’s Divisional Round of the NFL Playoffs simply had to be the best in not just football history, but perhaps sports history.
Three road underdogs not only covered the NFL spreads offered at MaximBet, but won outright. All four games ended on the final play, whether it was a kick as time expired in regulation or a touchdown in overtime.
Both No. 1 seeds fell. Aaron Rodgers lost, and now he’ll have so much more free time to do his own research into the next COVID cure. I’m thinking he should try a dolphin douche this time.
And, most importantly, Tom Brady lost. There will be no eighth ring this year. And, if his retirement talk gets louder, no eighth ring ever. We all get to experience and celebrate that together. As a civilization.
We still have two games coming up this weekend and I’ll parse through the Conference Championship odds, lines and totals at MaximBet to deliver those picks Friday.
For now, let us appreciate the 48 hours of football we just witnessed.
Cincinnati Bengals 19, Tennessee Titans 16
After waiting 31 years to win a playoff game, the Bengals decided seven days was plenty for their next victory. I mentioned last week that Tennessee was probably the worst No. 1 playoff seed since the last time they took the honor in 2008.
Cincy was the perfect team to step in there and steal one from Ryan Tannehill and his suddenly generous hands. And they did it their way, using their brand of football — getting your quarterback sacked nine times on the way to victory.
Burrow got downright cuddly with the Titans’ defense, especially Justin Simmons, who, in many cultures, would owe Burrow’s parents a donkey and a couple of sheep as a dowry after those three public take-downs.
San Francisco 49ers 13, Green Bay Packers 10
There was a rumor floating around thanks to one of Boomer Esiason’s “sources” that Aaron Rodgers was going to threaten to boycott the Super Bowl over the NFL’s Covid rules. He won’t get the chance now as the Super Bowl has continued its ongoing boycott of Aaron Rodgers.
I’m not sure Ivermectin can fix that.
Jimmy Garoppolo continues to be the best quarterback hated by his fanbase. He has never lost a playoff game for San Francisco, on the road or at home. He’s also never lost to the Los Angeles Rams, who they play this Sunday for a chance to go back to their second Super Bowl in three seasons.
I can see why you’d want to run that guy out of town.
Los Angeles Rams 30, Tampa Bay Buccaneers 27
No team had ever lost four fumbles AND blown a 20-point lead in the playoffs and still managed to win the game before the Rams did it Sunday.
Because they had to. Tom Brady was on the other team, contemplating retirement and if there’s one thing that guy won’t do is go out like Dan Marino or Ben Roethlisberger. No sir. Tom Brady is a like a herpes sore. Just when you think you’ve got him contained, you get a 20-point outbreak.
But Matt Stafford had the solution this time, the protection from that Brady playoff STD and all it took was firing off maybe the best pass of his life to one of the best players in the world. Cooper Kupp.
The Rams now host the NFC Championship with a chance to host the Super Bowl two weeks later, just another thing that’s never happened in the NFL before, until last year.
Kansas City Chiefs 42, Buffalo Bills 36
At no point did this game appear like it would end or should end. Everybody’s talking about changing the NFL overtime rules so each team gets at least one possession, but we’d still be playing it today as I’m writing this on Tuesday morning. The final score would be something like 1277-1270.
And even then, it would be because the clock on the overtime period expired. Defenders were no longer making stops. They were just directing traffic to the end zones. Acting as driving obstacles at best.
Kansas City now hosts its fourth consecutive AFC Championship game and Patrick Mahomes has still yet to step foot on an opposing team’s field in the postseason.
Adam Greene is @TheFirstMan on Twitter.
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